Alloting

If you’re planning to stage an addiction intervention for your loved one, there are a few things you should know well in advance before you do. And while you are not responsible for your loved one’s addiction, proper preparation for the intervention can determine, to an extent, its success. The intervention is intended to confront the addict with their own behaviors and let them know how they are hurting their loved ones and any other damage to the relationship they may be causing.

The family, and frequently very close friends, must also be prepared to establish strong boundaries . For instance, if the addict is constantly borrowing money from you and never returning it, you might say during the intervention that you’re going to stop doing this. It’s important not to present this boundary as a threat or an alternation, but to say it with love, and tell the addict you’re feelings for them are part of the reason the boundary is being established. In addition, they must be prepared for the addict to begin his or her manipulation techniques as soon as they realize the situation they’re in. These are just a few of the fundamental aspects of interventions. If you’re thinking about planning one for one of your loved ones, it’s extremely important you seek professional consultation.

I’m was just exiting a private bank Singapore offers all residence when I decided to put into practice what I just learned during a weekend workshop in Singapore concerning the art of listening. I find it relatively easy to listen happily in nature, the leaves, flowers, grasses, lakes, trees and hills because they do not think and worry like I do, so they do not provoke thinking on my part. Maybe for birds and other animals there is some rudimentary thinking going on, but that does not need any form of engagement I thought. Thought can make a problem out of everything, but most of us find the beauty of selfless conscious listening much easier to come upon in nature than among people.

Why is it so difficult to listen to each other? For example the private bank I was in, I over-heard a conversation, which was happening behind me, were the man was talking about what happened to him at his place of work today, and the woman who he was talking to had to keep asking him to repeat his question, because it was obvious she wasn’t listening. What I learned in the workshop was to practice the act of listening, when I do this I will not find it difficult to hear what my partner is saying. Instead of being busy with self-concern, the space is open to hearing, seeing and understanding the meaning of their words. Then, if I don’t understand, I can have the freedom to ask for clarification. I was told without this open space of presence, energy, the inner tapes of human conditioning presses hard to be heard. They do not want to make way for listening to others. It’s like, how can I possibly hear you when I’m dying to say something to myself? How can I take the time and care or bother to understand when I think that what I have to say is more important?

So, getting in a car with my partner sitting in the drivers seat, I ask how his day was and I am genuinely listening to him without needing to comment until he’s finished with what he has to say. I feel as if this ‘act of listening’, is really an act of love.